Dear Level
Death to the Three-Date Rule
We’re all grown. Let’s forget archaic constructs and feel free to have sex whenever we want.
Update 6/7/22: Level has a new home. You can read this article and other new articles by visiting LEVELMAN.com.
A week from now, I will be 47 years old. I am as grown as grown can be. I have an adult daughter and a teenaged daughter. I’m a divorcée and a fiancée, two fancy French words that give me extra grown woman status. I’m doing well in my career and thriving in all areas of my life. I’m blessed to have made good choices.
So why is it that a 25-year-old book and a 22-year-old television show can still control my thought process?
In 1995, Grand Central Publishing released The Rules, a self-help guide written by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider. The subtitle is anti-feminist as hell — Time Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right — and the guidance within the pages even more awful. The “rules” were all catered toward changing you into a man’s idea of the perfect woman: Always wear heels; get a nose job; wear your hair long; don’t call him, ever; go out as much as possible, even if you’re not in the mood. (The one that makes me facepalm the hardest? If you have sex with him and spend the night, get dressed…
