Just Rankin’ Sh!t
5 Best Excuses to Avoid Post-Quarantine Social Events, Ranked
Just because you’re vaccinated doesn’t mean you’re trying to do everydamnthing!
5. You’re still waiting for that second vaccination to kick in
As if 14 months of daily video meetings wasn’t enough, now your co-workers wanna go to a bar together? Cop the Pfizer plea. Perfect for last-minute invites, but unfortunately this won’t work for anything that’s more than two to three weeks out. (Also, avoid this one if you’ve posted evidence on the ’Gram — you never know who’s gonna fuck around and go all Easy Rawlins on your excuse.)
4. Your partner’s not vaxxed up
Dinner with other couples can be fun. It can also be extremely… not. Next time an acquaintance or couple you don’t know that well tries to rope y’all into two hours of small talk, just throw your boo under the bus. They don’t need to know your partner has been free and clear for three months!
3. Ah, damn, you thought the hang was virtual
Also known as the “no wonder there was no one else in the Zoom!” Taking Uno digital was fine at first, but your girl’s best friend…
