What to Do When You Have a Crush on a Married Couple
Navigating my first throuple
Gwinnett County, Georgia, has a name that’s fun to say aloud — but it’s not as much of a fun place to live if you’re queer.
Being raised in those Atlanta outskirts, I was told not to have pride for being queer. “Keep that gay stuff to yourself,” was actually uttered to me at one point. The message was clear and quite effective — I did not acknowledge myself as a sexual being until I landed out west, in the liberal city of San Francisco. The Golden City offered a new promise; no longer did I feel out of place because in San Francisco there’s always someone even weirder.
As I began self-exploration during my twenties, San Francisco was a conducive backdrop for my sexual self-discovery. I learned about creative sex positions, fetishes, sex toys, and polyamory.
Oh, polyamory.
On dating apps like Grindr, I’d seen users openly disclose being in “open relationships.” I needed someone to break down the difference between ethical nonmonogamy and cheating because at first, it seemed like next-level infidelity.
Before San Francisco, I probably would’ve never become curious about polyamory. I read The Ethical Slut, which is basically the bible for people experimenting with alternatives to…
