Dear Level

To Lube or Not to Lube? We Have Answers

Time for a little slick talk, y’all

Aliya S. King
LEVEL
Published in
4 min readMay 22, 2020

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Illustration: Janet Sung

Update 6/7/22: Level has a new home. You can read this article and other new articles by visiting LEVELMAN.com.

So. Let’s slide right into this week’s discussion. (See what I did there?)

Do you think you need to use an external lubrication in your sexual relationship? In a very anecdotal study I conducted on social media — just for you, dear reader — many women reported that some type of extra moisture made sex more enjoyable. But the majority of their partners — that’s you, dear reader — don’t use it regularly, or even at all.

The thing is, the ROI is so high that using lubrication during sex is like being a good kisser: As long as you’re doing it the right way, you can only gain good lover points. As always, you’ve gotta communicate with your partner. If you don’t feel comfortable bringing up lube, there’s a good chance she doesn’t either.

Lube is a complicated topic. Especially for men’s egos. There’s a common perception that a woman’s sexual organs lubricate in relation to her arousal, hence loverman braggadocio like “I’m the one who put the satin on ya panties.” But it’s very rarely that simple. A woman can be fully geared up and ready for action — but depending on her…

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Aliya S. King
LEVEL

Aliya S. King is an author, freelance writer and editor.