Just Rankin’ Sh!t

‘The Five Heartbeats’ Members Who Could’ve Gone Solo, Ranked

Happy 30th birthday to the best thinly veiled music biopic of all time. All tiiiiime!

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6. Terrence “Dresser” Williams

Dresser had a decent voice, but getting washed in a dance contest by an old man — in front of your homies, no less — isn’t the most promising indicator of solo stardom.

5. Anthony “Choirboy” Stone

It’s hard to find a name less sexy than Choirboy. Yet somehow, even when the whole band was bombing, he was the only member who ever got shit thrown at him while onstage. Doesn’t exactly scream “we want more.”

4. J.T. Matthews

J.T. had crazy pipes, heartthrob appeal, and was a total womanizer. Sounds like a solo breakout to us.

3. Flash

Eddie Kane Jr. put it plainly in one of the movie’s most memorable scenes: “You want my spot, Flash? Well, you ain’t gonna get it because you ain’t got it!” Judging by the cheesy pop jingles Flash is shown hawking later in the film, Eddie may have had a point.

2. Donald “Duck” Matthews