Just Rankin’ Sh!t

The 9 Real Oreo Flavors That Await You in Hell, Ranked

Come get your man Nabisco, he’s whylin’

LEVEL Editors
LEVEL
Published in
2 min readSep 29, 2020

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Photo: Amazon

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9. Carrot Cake

Let this exist as your introduction to a fundamental concept of Oreodom: If it has “golden” cookies, it’s not an Oreo. (You may wanna take notes, as we’ll be revisiting this principle a few times.)

8. Watermelon

In journalism, they say that “how” and “why” are the most important questions. Nothing has ever proven that as effectively as this monstrosity. (In this case, though, we’d also include “who” — as in “who the hell would ever fix their mouth to eat the pasty green and red filling in one of these?”)

7. Supreme

Sure, the co-branded drop from the hypebeast favorite tasted like a regular Oreo — but at $8 for two cookies, and thousands more on reseller sites, it’s the price that’s disgusting.

6. Tiramisu

The real thing is an incredible end to a great Italian meal (along with an espresso). This version, which replaces coffee- and mascarpone-soaked ladyfinger cookies for “two…

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