Just Rankin’ Sh!t

The 8 Kid Rappers Most Likely to Rob You, Ranked

When the recess bell rings, tuck your chain!

LEVEL Editors
Published in
2 min readMar 30, 2020


Photo Source: KMazur/Getty Images

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8. Another Bad Creation

With Michael Bivins playing impresario and a young Dallas Austin on production, there was no way these Atlanta kids could lose — and they didn’t. But we don’t think these literal eight-year-olds were at the playground for anything other than the monkey bars.

7. Kris Kross

Kinda hard to run down on someone when your pants are on backward.

6. Lil’ Romeo

When you’re Master P’s son, you’ve got pedigree — but when you get a record deal at five years old, even bubblegum rap is a few years off.

5. Quo

A little-kid interracial ripoff of Onyx, signed by Michael Jackson, with a Redman feature on their lead single? That’s some peak 1993 shit right there. But wait, it gets better: The White kid grew up to be Wade Robson, and the Black kid grew up to marry Reagan Gomez.

4. Lil Bow Wow

He was 11 years old by the time he dropped an album, but Shad had already been through some shit.

3. Da Youngsta’s

The youngest of the Philly trio was about 14 when they dropped “Pass the Mic,” so they squeak onto the list. It’s a good thing, too—between their music (they’re the vocal sample on Gang Starr’s “Mass Appeal”) and their vibe, they’re the first entry here to make you think twice about getting on their bad side.

2. Shyheim

With a Wu-Tang affiliation and a Shaolin-sanctioned “Rugged Child” moniker, the 14-year-old’s debut made noise. What, you’re gonna tell him he’s wack?

1. Illegal

Good: These bad lil’ motherfuckers announced themselves with a song called “Head or Gut.” Better: It took shots at everyone from Kriss Kross to Chi-Ali. Best: The video depicted them handing out a beatdown to a grown-ass man. You see those kids in your eighth-grade cafeteria, you get to stepping.