Just Rankin’ Sh!t
The 7 Worst Sex Punchlines From Otherwise Great Rappers, Ranked
Just because you’ve got bars doesn’t mean they’re all keepers
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7. Drake, “Best I Ever Had”
“My shirt ain’t got no stripes, but I can make your p***y whistle” is bad enough, right? Oh, no, young Aubrey’s just getting started; you need to know the tune! Specifically, The Andy Griffith Show theme song. Which, first, that’s a hell of an awkward stroke. And second, is there a less sexual show than one with a little kid, a matronly aunt, and Don Knotts?
6. Kendrick Lamar, “Backseat Freestyle”
Yes, “my left stroke just went viral” (“Humble”) is hilariously terrible. But nothing will ever hold a candle to the chorus of this otherwise untouchable track off Good Kid, m.A.A.d City. “I pray my d**k get big as the Eiffel Tower/So I can fuck the world for 72 hours?” We get that, K. Dot’s playing himself as a teenager, and teenagers say some dumb things, but it’s tough to enjoy rapping along to this one when the thing in question is this dumb.
