Just Rankin’ Sh!t
The 5 Meatless Burgers Least Likely to Offend Non-Vegetarians, Ranked
We’re not eating anything called Quorn, but we can make room on our plate for these
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5. Gardenburger Original
The OG of this shit. Yeah, it’s a bit of a relic in this age of protein-rich plant-based burgers — basically mushrooms, onions, brown rice, and rolled oats, it feels straight out of a ’70s food co-op — but you gotta respect the architect. (Unless you’re vegan; it’s got cheese in it, too.)
4. Chili’s black bean burger
Real talk, one of the best things you’ve never ordered from a chain menu. Black bean burgers are a tough needle to thread; grocery store versions are always drier than Mike Pence’s palate, so best to make them yourself or get them at a restaurant. If you’re looking to avoid meat but also the wild food-science feats that go into most alternatives, just rock with the humble legume.
