Just Rankin’ Sh!t

The 5 Best Non-Racist Name Changes for Washington’s NFL Team, Ranked

Political and correct

Photo: Scott Taetsch/Getty Images

5. Werewolves

Because alliteration.

4. Natives

You know, you really can honor the tribes who lived in in the U.S. before the murdering-ass colonizers arrived… without being racist.

3. Go-gos

Go-go was the official music of Chocolate City long before Washington’s city council voted it into legislation back in February. Just imagine: Adrian Peterson sprinting into the end zone for a touchdown before beating his feet to the percussion of “Sexy Lady” or “Da Butt,” while gentrifiers in the stands watch in amused confusion.

2. 44s

It’s officially time to formally honor the historic, G.O.A.T. president of our generation — and troll Trump in the process.

1. Redtails

Its about damn time we roll out the red carpet for the legendary Tuskegee Airmen that flew in World War II — both a nod to the predominantly Black population in the nation’s capital and an overdue reversal of an offensive team name that has persisted for damn near a century.

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