Dear Level

Nice Guys Can Be Fuckboys, Too

Never mind what ‘FBoy Island’ says — the two identities are not mutually exclusive. This you?

Elisabeth Ovesen | NYT Bestselling Author
LEVEL
Published in
5 min readAug 27, 2021

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Photo Illustration: Save As/Medium. Source: Getty Images.

“There’s an influx of good guys in the world!” said no woman ever.

Heartbreak after heartbreak, women tend to learn early in their dating lives that most of the men they meet won’t be worth their weight in salt, and that they are, in fact, fuckboys. You know, the ones who come into a woman’s life with selfish intentions and impose upon her, only to play with her heart, distract her from her goals, and waste her time.

Sure, there are some really great guys out there as well, men who are forthcoming, honest, and enter a woman’s life with the sole intention of improving it. (Or so I’ve heard.) In her lifetime, a woman might come across one or two of these dating- and/or marriage-eligible men. The rest will be catch-and-release. Back into the water they go.

I recently watched a couple of episodes of FBoy Island, a new Bachelorette-like dating competition on HBO Max in which three women are courted by 24 men, half of whom are looking for love and the other half self-proclaimed fuckboys who are solely after the $100,000 grand prize. The series wasn’t for me, but I found it interesting that the men — whose intentions are initially kept private — were identified as either “nice guys” or “FBoys.” As if the two are mutually exclusive.

Supposed good guys can cause just as much heartache as fuckboys — perhaps more because they’re so unsuspecting. You may never see them coming, but they’re out here, fooling women left and right. Sure, most men fancy themselves as good guys; after all, who wants to admit to being the type of person who’d let the clock run down on a woman’s reproductive years, pretending he wants a family and lifetime together with her just to slink out minutes before her womb turns into a pumpkin? Meanwhile, he was only interested in sex the whole time.

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Elisabeth Ovesen | NYT Bestselling Author
LEVEL
Writer for

3x New York Times Bestselling Author | 'The House of Ill Repute (Kensington Publishing, 2024)