I Grew Up Black, Privileged, and Totally Unaware
I didn’t learn of my blind spot until I fell in love with men whose lives bore little resemblance to mine
As a middle-class Black kid, I learned of my privilege relatively late in life. Yes, the big systemic kind of privilege: unearned benefits granted to those who already enjoy a socioeconomic or otherwise structural advantage. Although we usually discuss the concept as something related to being White or male, other forms of the phenomenon go undiscussed. Like mine.
Once I started dating Black men in college, I realized I had an unspoken set of advantages. I did not grow up in a low-income household like some of my counterparts; both of my parents are college graduates and proudly display their degrees for others to see. I grew up surrounded by other Black middle-class families, families in which kids enjoyed the latest video games and technology while our parents discussed work promotions around the dinner table.
That doesn’t mean I got everything I asked for growing up; my parents were firm believers in earning what I wanted. But I believed that as long as I worked hard, I’d be given what I asked for. I didn’t grow up with financial stress, and in my mind, a strong work ethic made anything and everything possible.
