Dear Level

An Open Relationship Is No Excuse For Infidelity

Respect the boundaries of your relationship—monogamous or otherwise—for a drama-free love life

Elisabeth Ovesen | NYT Bestselling Author
LEVEL
Published in
5 min readApr 23, 2021

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Illustration: Save As/Medium; Source: Getty Images

From the onset of my relationships with Darius and Damian — the men who eventually became my first and second husbands — I was forthcoming about my unwillingness to stop dating Dwayne. He was a man I’d met and fallen in love with long before each of my husbands entered my life.

Throughout the dating process and while living with me before our marriages, Darius and Damian respectively accepted that Dwayne’s needs came before theirs. So, when each of them suggested marriage, I was willing — so long as it didn’t alter our polyamorous arrangement. They accepted the terms, and with that, both Darius and Damian became cuckolds.

I loved it.

Both were kept men who didn’t work regularly or pay bills, which was also part of the cuckoldry lifestyle. If they wanted to have sex with other women at any time, they could do so while living on their own, but not while being supported by me. Communication and transparency were all I asked for — I wanted both relationships to be devoid of lies, omissions, or cheating. Still, even with clearly marked exits and the example of my own honesty, Darius and Damian…

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Elisabeth Ovesen | NYT Bestselling Author
LEVEL
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3x New York Times bestselling author, art enthusiast, and design girlie living between Los Angeles and New York City