Dear Level

A Man Should Never Feel Ashamed to Go Dutch on a Date

Men, we appreciate when you offer to pay, but I promise we’re not thinking about it

Photo: pixelheadphoto/Getty Images

Update 6/7/22: Level has a new home. You can read this article and other new articles by visiting LEVELMAN.com.

So you’ve asked someone out on a date. It’s a dinner date, not too fancy. (You’re outside, hopefully.) You both order modestly. You get the special. One drink. No dessert. The bill comes and it’s placed in the center of the table.

What next? Do you:

1. Take the bill and pay it. You asked the person out. So, naturally, it’s on you.
2. Wait to see what the other person does. If they take it and pay, awesome.
3. Before the bill comes, you’ve already asked to split the check.

I thought I had my mind made up on how this should play out. But I’m actually not sure where I stand these days.

Back when I was new to dating, I always expected my suitor to choose option 1. You asked for the pleasure of my company, and you got it (at a cost, of course!). I didn’t take into consideration how much money I made or what my date did for a living. I wouldn’t even do that slow-motion fake-out reach for the check, for…